Pilot: Captain, we're arriving at our destination, but something must be wrong with this (gibberish navigation item) Claus gave us.
Captain: I knew he was crooked, what's wrong?
Pilot: Well for one thing, it thinks the planet up ahead is Earth.
Captain: So much for fixing our navigation computer, prep the ship for landing, let's check it out.
Begin Puppets
(Also note that the first few lines of Puppets involve the captain and crewmember discussing the fact that they haven't seen any intelligent life in the galaxy yet, which contradicts The Truth About Aliens. We'll need to edit or cut that part out.)
End Puppets
Puppet Crewmember: Hey Captain, take a look at this, think maybe the navigation computer was right?
Captain: * Exclamations and gibberish of disbelief*
*Pause*
Captain: Damn you all to hell! You blew it up! You blew it all up!
Puppet Crewmember: Must have been out of our hands.
You may need to correct my wording on that one, I've never actually seen Planet of the Apes.
“65 million years later…give or take a few thousand years”
Darkness…A Television flickers to life. It is the only light source in the dark room. The television is silent. Images flash across the screen perhaps some advertisements and some images of violence or war. Slowly the volume increases and the intro for a news station begins to play (possible media joke here). A reporter sits behind a desk.
Reporter: Hello, I’m [Name] welcome to [Name] news at ten. We turn now to our continuing coverage of the exciting events unfolding off the coast of Mexico. The geological survey team, which only weeks ago released evidence that they have discovered what appears to be an enormous object lying just beneath the sea-bed near the resort town of Progreso on the Yucatan Peninsula, has released the first photos of the object. We now go live to [Name] currently aboard the USS [Name] stationed just outside the primary excavation site.
We are now aboard the ship with the reporter and his camera crew.
Reporter: Thanks [name].The mood here is one of both elation and confusion. After less than a week of excavation we are just now getting the first images from the dig site which is actually located nearly 125 feet underwater. It took nearly two weeks just to prepare the site for excavation, with pumps running night and day in order to remove the water from the site which is now in dry dock protected by an immense concrete cylinder. An excavation of this type is unprecedented and it certainly would not have been possible without the massive support from the U.S. Navy as well as Army Core of Engineers who are on site. The sheer level of military involvement here has created a shroud of mystery and speculation about their interest in the discovery. President [name] in a statement on Thursday said the US military involvement is merely a matter of practical importance in sharing this potentially remarkable discovery with the world “Without US army and Navy support this excavation would simply not be possible”. Indeed that seems to be the case here today as current estimates put the cost of the excavation at several hundred mill – he is cut off as a soldier in uniform steps into frame and covers the mike.
Muffled voices.
Soldier:Shut it down, please sir.
Reporter: Excuse me? Im in the middle of a live feed here.
Soldier: (still covering the mike) The site is no longer open to the press (he begins walking toward the cameraman) Turn that off (his hand covers the lens). Off (angrily)
Cameraman: Cool it GI Joe its off , Ok its off. (we now see a shot of the cameraman’s feet and the deck of the ship.)
Soldier:Yeah? Whats that blinking red light mean then. Gimme that thing damnit. The feed cuts out.
Reporter in Studio: (holding ear) Hello? Hello [Field Reporter Name]? I’m not sure what we just saw there folks but it doesn’t look good well be sure to keep you up to date on the situation as we begin to learn more. (Holding his ear again) What? Yes ok….mhhmm. Were just now getting breaking news from Washington, the president is holding an emergency press conference in a little under half an hour. I can only imagine that it has to do with what we just saw it simply can’t be coincidence. Well be bringing you live coverage of that conference in just a little while here, stick around.
Fade to black then into “The Truth about Aliens”
Notes: I realize that there are some things here that would be fairly hard to do in a live performance, but im simply writing it as I envision it, I would rather have more than we need and then be able to cut then to have to struggle for content. Its wordy and its a bit on the serious side (I think thats ok it will help sell the comedy later) and there's alot of background and little details we dont rly need but could help sell the performance as a whole. I imagined that the second tie in would revolve around the press secretary (Howard i think?) who is actually the real president ( he had to keep his identity safe until all the aliens revealed themselves) explaining to the audience that Conway and his crew have been the ones gathering all this intel on the alien races vying for control of earth and then explaining to Conway what his new mission entails. Namely that one of the aliens captured after the press conference revealed that the dinosaurs were destroyed by a DIFFERENT previously unheard of alien race when they felt that the dinosaurs were getting too powerful. The president shows Conway a picture of the partially excavated statue of a Trex. ..yeah something like that. Anyway feedback? ill talk to you guys at the meeting on monday.
In present day our hero is briefing his crew on their mission and why it is important for earth that they succeed he explains that it is imperative that the human race become more aware of its surroundings following a certain debacle that he recounts to them:
Suddenly, mid-story an impact rocks the ship while they're en route to an unexplored planet. His ship is disabled and lost. When the crew grumbles about distracting them with history lessons, a visitor arrives in the airlock:
The final scene ends with the captain's crewmate finding a certain familiar statue of a dinosaur...The captain turns to face the audience and the truth dawns on him...His earth, his reality, is doomed to be repeated. Over and over for the amusement of the audience.
The various settings (prehistory, presidential speech, spaceship, and planet of puppets) really lends itself to our strength of special effects. There is even the possibility of a trippy dream-sequence for the aliens story if we could manage it. The visitor story could take place within the ship with a working airlock and special effect laser guns. The puppets story has the greatest potential in my opinion, we could have all the props and the stage look like cardboard cut outs with the actors looking like hand puppets.
This site has a number of short science fiction related skits. They dont require a large number of actors and some of them might allow us to have some really cool scenery/effects.
